...test ;)

...april 10, 2014 - ever since that date has been confirmed, i tend to look forward for that day to come with anxiety and excitement. i am thinking that it will be a make or break. weeks before that day, the pressure and stress greatly enveloped me, as much as i don't want and how hard i tried not to cry, especially in front of anyone, i broke down. i just felt that i need to release my anxiety that day, i tried to rush going out and hide at the CR, but i lost my composure. i cried in front of them. but i guess, it made me feel more relaxed afterwards. it felt like my emotions will start anew.

...i felt that things become tougher as the date nears, anxiety, stress, frustrations and tiredness, but i somehow felt numb... i was thinking about things after the event... i was just looking forward for the holy week break, cause by that time, it was all over... few days before, things were still unclear, preparations are still not enough, things needed are incomplete... yet i am positive that things will be okay... everything will turn out good... then the event has been indefinitely postponed...

...i initially felt disappointed because it means we will start from scratch all over again once another schedule is set. but as the situation sinked in, i also felt relieved that we will be given more time to prepare... well, at least i now had the idea of how to do things, on how to prepare, on what to expect, on how much effort to exert, and on how i should handle things - tiredness, pressure, anxiety, and i should learn how to have grace under pressure.

...it was a learning experience that i should be reminded always especially whenever things get tough! :)